“Miracles are a way of earning release from fear.” A Course in Miracles
Welcome to my new blog on WordPress, raw bones and all. The widgets and links will come later. Meanwhile it’s great to be back in the writing circuit. I wanted to write something light and airy however my thoughts are otherwise. With journal writing what emerges is often intense.
We need some miracles.
Begin: I made resolutions for 2013 and I’m excited about them. I’m going to help people learn to read. My resolution is to continue working in the field of spirituality, education, and expressive arts therapy. My resolution is to continue believing in miracles.
Begin: How can we begin again after each tragedy? Newtown. Aurora. Tucson. Columbine. Does anyone even remember Paducah, Kentucky? How about Conyers, Georgia?
Consider: When tragedy strikes again asking ourselves “why” is ridiculous. I still find it interesting that families hide mental health issues We hurry on to the next topic. People will talk about broken arms, the weather, and hauling kids to basketball practice, but don’t go to that other place. You know…about that…problem? An evasive hint becomes a silent scream. Even close friends hide the truth from each other. Don’t talk about that! Don’t talk about depression, bipolar disorder, sexual abuse, betrayal, or the isolated and anxious relative. Are we so embarrassed to be human? Hush, hush, bang, bang.
One phrase that keeps repeating itself is that ugly cowardly phrase “nobody said anything.” This doesn’t mean we become busybodies or blind supporters of pablum. It means somebody files a report somewhere. It means somebody took a chance. It means a caseworker, supervisor, or detective worked a longer day. A neighbor reached out.
And sometimes we can do nothing-but I can’t accept that.
I think Oprah Winfrey singlehandedly blew the lid off of families hiding problems. We still have a long way to go because neighborhoods and families still hide secrets.
Begin: Talk about issues. Talk about life. Ask for help.
Consider: The issue is never about blame. Anyone with an iota of understanding knows blame is useless. It is a psychological defense mechanism. The concept of blame belongs in the caveman era. Blaming someone, unless the current scenario is centered on catching a criminal before another offense is committed, is not part of intervention, healing or therapy. The goal is to understand the reasons underneath thoughts, impulses, and behavior when children are young. The goal is to guide people in helping them understand that options are available.
Begin: I recommend a couple of books. Stop Teaching Our Kids to Kill by Lt. Col. Dave Grossman and Gloria DeGaetano, written in 1999 by a retired military man and his educator co-author, delves into the facts of our violence epidemic. We may argue until we are numb, but interpersonal violence seems to be on the rise. How many ways can we spell a cry for help?
The second book that may now seem dated is: High Risk: Children Without a Conscience. Published in the late 80’s, High Risk is still loudly relevant and should be required reading in any psychology or sociology class. Learn to spot problem behaviors, not only in children, but in family dynamics to understand how deviance can be intergenerational. Recognizing challenges is the first step in learning to acknowledge the red flags and then to address them.
Beyond the simplistic and moronic territorial view of blame, shame, and name-calling, families and teachers have been asking for early childhood intervention, programs for education, and community involvement since the inception of Head Start and other intelligent programs.
I believe there is hope for the future and the future is now. Let my first blog of 2013 be part of the act of beginning.
Coming up: What is an intuitive reading?